[Take a deep breath in...... and out..... Let's Go]
I used to sacrifice my happiness for the sake of others, too.
I used to try my best to bend my personality to fit someone else’s standards.
I used to feel lonely but always terrified to connect.
I used to make excuses for my actions even though they were justified.
I used to cover how I truly felt to avoid pissing off my lover.
I used to wonder why my childhood was different and not like the movies.
I used to wonder why my father didn't love me.
I used to wonder why I wasn't good enough.
I used to put my needs and wants on the back burner to help others accomplish their dreams.
I used to battle with depression.
I used to be an alcoholic.
I used to try to escape my reality.
I used to think I was too much to handle.
I used to feel unworthy of a different reality because of the guilt from my current one.
I used to be the one to be the fuck up in all of my relationships.
I used to feel numb inside.
I used to feel I didn't deserve to cry.
I used to mistreat everyone I [thought] I loved.
I used not know what love truly was.
I used to feel hopeless and lost.
I used to never know when things would "get better."
I used to wonder why me.
I used to think I was cursed.
I used to beg for the pain to stop.
I used to walk on eggshells to keep the peace.
I used to cry late at night, in silence so no one else could hear.
I used to dim my light so I would not outshine others.
I used to apologize for being myself.
I used to.
[to be continued]
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